Before...

There are things that happen in all of our lives for better or worse that make us stop and KNOW we need to pray. There are times when we feel like the only thing we CAN do is pray. I took maybe twenty or so steps this morning before I literally dropped to my knees on my front porch and told God this: Help me help them, help me help me, be with us all, and I REALLY need to get rid of some kittens. Thing is, though, that God was already doing what I asked Him to do before I said a word. He was there waaaaaaaay before I stopped and talked to Him. He was already helping me and them, but I just felt like saying those words aloud to God - I figure even if He can't make the kittens miraculously disappear that He got a chuckle out of my plea...

So I guess what I'm trying to say is that yes, we do need to pray because our relationship with God is strengthened that way and He needs to hear from us what is on our hearts so that we learn to always trust Him, but I feel like His answer to me this morning was, "Quit worrying, Malinda. Life isn't easy and you're just learning that. I'll help you. Just lean on Me."

I forget to let go of my burdens and worries and let Jesus have them. Not all of the time, but the big ones are hard to let go of. I just have to keep remembering that even though I do ok, God does better. He is already there - before I pray and before I even know I'm gonna need to talk to Him - He is there...

I hope you all have a wonderful day.

Malinda

A New Summer

The lady bug is kind of out of focus, but I still really like the picture. I think I was trying more to get all the tangly tentacles of the pea vines anyway. Can you imagine being that small while the world all around you is huge? Sometimes I feel like that! My Lovin' Husband's beloved lemon cucumbers are comin' up...

and the beans... (finally - we were getting a little worried!)

Potatoes make flowers...

When you are driving with the windows down in the country this time of year, you can smell the honeysuckle. I have always loved it. I used to walk down the road from our house when I was a kid and pick the flowers to get the nectar out of them. I was delighted to find some vines on my neighbor's fence. It is so pretty and I love to look at the blooms. It makes my heart happy.

Let us talk about the barn for a minute. (It is too little to be a barn, really, but it is just so much MORE than a shed...) Usually when I take pictures of it I try to leave out the fencing and extra things that make the picture not so pretty, but yesterday I decided that the extra stuff looks just fine. It is pretty with the stuff leaned against it - in an honest way, I think. People are like that, I believe. A lot of times we sell ourselves and others short when we pretend that everything is ok when it isn't. We all have burdens leaning on us that we try to take out of the picture, but the truth is, we're better in the long run if we let others help us through our pain rather than hide it and pretend like it is not there. The burdens don't ugly us up, they just make us real. ANYWAY. I like the barn. It makes me happy to look at. Especially when the sun is setting.

The clouds were so beautiful all day yesterday.

Go looking for beauty today. You'll find God there. No matter how ugly you feel, you'll find God there, too. Look inside yourself and accept who you are. God is waiting for you there.

Pardon my brain today. We have had a crazy week and I've been thinking about all the places that I have encountered Jesus. Everywhere doesn't even begin to cover it...

Easter Morning

I had never been to a sunrise service until this year. I'll never miss one again if I can help it. The first thing I saw when I looked out my window was this. (below)

The next thing I saw were my Irises blooming beautifully.

We don't have a big dinner. I don't even usually get a new dress. This year I wore a skirt that I found at the goodwill and hadn't worn yet! My husband isn't much a church goer and I mostly just celebrate Easter in my heart. Which is ok with me - but this year was a little different.

Our church and two others switch out community services for sunrise at Easter and also others like Thanksgiving and what not. The minister at the church we were going to this year asked me to play a couple of songs. I have always wanted to arrange hymns for solo violin in an appalachian style, but never had and decided that it was way past time. The newness of Easter was just what I needed to inspire me to actually get a marker and transcribe what was going through my head when I played.

I have learned this easter season that it is ok to be spiritual. That it is ok to be moved emotinoally by the enormity and mystery of it all and that it is even ok that I celebrate it alone (not alone at church, of course). Because my faith is just that - mine - and that God wants me not to shout at folks what I believe, but to live it quietly. To be the hands and feet of Jesus does not take many words at all - if any.

I have a different feeling this year. A feeling of hope and goodness and being loved and saved. Deep, still waters in my soul....

I hope that you feel hope. That God blesses you with peaceful waters and a stillness in your soul.

All my love,

Malinda